Love is such a complex subject. It is said that before you can love others, you must first love yourself. You must respect and admire your own actions, not to fuel your ego, but to make you credible.
When you see this love, you can then offer an equal to others.
Upon my study of anger, I found that 95% of the time anger is self inflicted. That is that when you are angry at someone, you were first angry at yourself.
Love is exactly the same. If you sense your love is fading, first look at yourself and correct and tweak your own actions.
If you could avoid expectations in love, you’ll be surprised at how frequent love repays your own endeavours.
Imagine a few blissful hours with your children in the park. You’ve bonded a little more. You walk home alongside the supermarket and seen and old lady struggling with her shopping. You have no hesitation; you tell the children to hold on a moment until you’ve helped pack the shopping in the car boot for this lady.
You return home and your partner has cooked the perfect meal, the house is tidy, the dining table set for a banquet. The children flitter through the house, find a seat to rest their tired body and sit quietly reading or watching television.
That may or may not be the perfect ending to a few hours play in the park, but it was if someone was watching.
The love you gave your children in the park, made you alert enough to see the lady struggling at the supermarket, whereas another day you’d have missed it. Your partner another day may well have been on the phone when you arrived back and flustered with the daily chores.
If you give it, you’ll receive it back! If you live in a world of lies, you’ll only ever dream of love…
Whilst this next story is called ‘Great Expectations’ it should be called, ‘Apply the Truth and Bliss Will Follow…’
Great Expectations
Pete Rose, the famous baseball player, and I have never met, but he taught me something so valuable that it changed my life.
Pete was being interviewed in spring training the year he was about to break Ty Cobb's all time hits record. One reporter blurted out, "Pete, you only need 78 hits to break the record. How many at-bats do you think you'll need to get the 78 hits?" Without hesitation, Pete just stared at the reporter and very matter-of-factly said, "78." The reporter yelled back, "Ah, come on Pete, you don't expect to get 78 hits in 78 at-bats do you?"
Mr. Rose calmly shared his philosophy with the throngs of reporters who were anxiously awaiting his reply to this seemingly boastful claim. "Every time I step up to the plate, I expect to get a hit! If I don't expect to get a hit, I have no right to step in the batter's box in the first place!"
"If I go up hoping to get a hit," he continued, "Then I probably don't have a prayer to get a hit. It is a positive expectation that has gotten me all of the hits in the first place."
When I thought about Pete Rose's philosophy and how it applied to everyday life, I felt a little embarrassed. As a business person, I was hoping to make my sales quotas. As a father, I was hoping to be a good dad. As a married man, I was hoping to be a good husband.
The truth was that I was an adequate salesperson, I was not so bad of a father, and I was an okay husband. I immediately decided that being okay was not enough! I wanted to be a great salesperson, a great father and a great husband. I changed my attitude to one of positive expectation, and the results were amazing. I was fortunate enough to win a few sales trips, I won Coach of the Year in my son's baseball league, and I share a loving relationship with my wife, Karen, with whom I expect to be married to for the rest of my life! Thanks,
Mr. Rose!
(Barry Spilchuk, Speaker and Author)
QUOTE: “I love you, and because I love you, I would sooner have you hate me for telling the truth than adore me for telling you lies.”
(Pietro Aretino)
ANDY BOLTON
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